"But I'm Tooooooo OOOOOld" - Age is Subjective - Remembering Raime

I work with people of all ages. I mean all ages. DailyLifeCoaching4Kids is geared toward children Pre-K - 3rd grade and their parents. Daily Life Consulting clients range in age from College age through pre and post-retirement age. My professor/mentor Dr. Sackler who is an unbelievable role model is a psychoanalyst who continues to work at 90 at a profession she began studying and training for in her mid 50s, after a very successful first career as a Biogeneticist. So when clients say things like "I'm too old to start over" or "I would feel so old going back to school again" or "I'm too old to be thinking of that career, it's a dream I gave up long ago" I say "THINK AGAIN!". I truly believe you're never "too old" to start living the life you want to live.

Age is relative, it's subjective in that no one knows how long they've got. So every day is precious. The insurance charts may say that x is young and z is old but it all depends on a person's life span. Some people die young and some people live a long time.

I always think of that concept on March 6th when I think of a conversation about age that I had with Raime who was 20 at the time. The year is 1996, I'm in Silicon Alley and it's the pioneer days of the internet. We're at the beginning of something so exciting and unbelievable. It's clear to all of us how the world and our lives are about to change but most people look at us like we just landed from Mars. I'm freaking out about my birthday which is coming up in a couple of months. I'm saying the same kinds of things clients say to me now. "Why didn't I do this when I was in college?" "What am I thinking leaving something I've been doing for a couple of years to start something new?" "What am I thinking?" and all the other things you think about when you're shifting from your original plan.

I didn't necessarily think I was too old to be beginning, it was more of a societal female age-ist thing. Raime didn't really get why I was having those thoughts, chronologically it really didn't make any sense for me to be freaking out that way.
Looking back, it certainly didn't make any sense. Looking back and thinking about Raime it certainly didn't make any sense.

Raime was diagnosed with an advanced stage of cancer 2 months later and died a few months after that. She was 21 years old when she died. So at the time I had the conversation with her she was very, very old if you think of age as connected to mortality. Chronologically she was very very young. I think of her often and especially on March 6th. She was a sweet, good girl who died way too young. She was too young and too precious to be old at 21. Raime, you are missed.

So next time you have one of those "but I'm too old" thoughts I suggest that you "SNAP OUT OF IT" to quote one of my favorite movies Moonstruck.

As hokey as it sounds today really is the first day of the rest of your life. It can be the beginning of something new and letting go of the old stuff that just isn't working for the life you want to be leading.

Enjoy the day your way,
RK