"Go-To-Girl" Syndrome - Q&A

As promised - I'm posting the questions I didn't get to answer on the board. If you didn't get your email reply please let me know and I'll send it on over the ether.

Question -
Kiki,
Nice to see you here.
I suffer from what I call "go-to-girl" syndrome. I agree to last-minute
assignments, deadlines that are moved up, projects that grow beyond the
original scope (with pay) because I like being the one editors count on. But
it takes its toll. I'm crazed right now. Maybe I don't need to be so
available and agreeable, but how do I change?


My answer -

Ok - you mention a couple of things " I like being the one editors count on" and
"Maybe I don't need to be so available and agreeable" and "but how do I change". You also mention that all this takes its toll.

Ok - one thing at a time because it's a multifaceted issue. But we'll use your question as a guidepost. "How do I change?" Well, that depends on why you want to change. Not need - that's clear by the "it takes its toll". What you do want is to be the one the editors can count on.

Is there another way to be this person - perhaps a modified version with new limits set by you and still be the one they count on? How might you go about doing that? What are some new boundaries and "B's Rules" that you could let them know about at the beginning of a project? And of course you're letting them know this in the nicest, most professional way. "I'm happy to do x,y,or z however....." which lets them know that you're available to be the go-to-person but in a new way.

The other question to ask yourself is why you want to be the one they count on. If it's strictly financial - you have your answer and making the change is more of an intellectual and time-management, stress-management one. If there's something else going on - such as an emotional need or habit to be the one people can rely on then the changes will have to include an internal component including some thought about how that came to be part of your makeup and whether it's still something you need and/or want.

Hope this helps as a starting off point - keep me posted!
Kiki